Rejection

One of the biggest pieces of advice that I hear being given to people wanting to pursue a career in the Arts is that you need a strong skin and you need be able to take the rejection. I think many of us have become experts in rejection from a very young age.
 
Despite being a sports fan and being reasonable good at a range different sports I always hated Physical Education in school. It was a one ticket to humiliation for me every single week. The teacher would always pick the most popular kids to be the two captains and they would then proceed to pick their best friends in order of popularity. I was always one of the last picks and it never got easier standing there waiting whilst every other person in your class was picked before you. I truly hope schools have stopped doing this but I am sure it still happens. My school experience was pretty similar throughout my entire time there and it amounted to a long list of rejections. Nobody would sit (or want to sit by me) in class, on the bus, at lunch and it truly hurt every single day.
 
I always remember putting my name down for a week long trip to an activity centre and there were only ten places available. My name was read first and it was read aloud it was booed. The truth is that I shouldn’t have gone but I did and remember the first comment when I got there was ‘why did you have to come’ and the person then proceeded to tell me that one of their friends didn’t get to go because I had taken their place. That week was not fun! Although I do remember the last day of that camp and deciding that I would play a little practical joke on them. I woke up very early and decided to change one of their watches and the clock on the wall. When they woke up it was about 7am but according to (Greenwich Dan Time) it was 9am which would have meant they had missed breakfast. I have never seen anybody move so fast running towards the dinner hall to find out that it hadn’t even opened yet!
 
I was a very odd child and was older than my years. I was afraid of girls and pretty much scared of my own shadow. I was torn apart for having my grandmothers red hair. I was called every kind of name you can imagine and told that I was disgusting pretty much daily. Along with my big glasses and outdated style there was no hope for me in the social climate of my youth. I will always remember sitting in class and being kicked by a girl across the table for having red hair. When I shouted out in pain the teacher told me off. I explained what had happened and the teacher did nothing. The girl did it again and again throughout the class. The teacher came over eventually and asked her to try and kick me and she pretended she couldn’t and teacher told me to stop messing around. At the end of the class and after about six kicks I showed the teacher my bruised leg which had skin missing and she hardly batted an eyelid.
 
Despite my career in music now I never really participated in anything musical at school. I will always remember singing out of tune to ensure that I wouldn’t get in the school choir as that was seen as social suicide. I truly feel there has been a big change in schools now and that people with musical talents are looked at so much better.
 
Rejection is never good and you can just become numb to it all and become experts in rejection and just pretty much expect to be rejected at every turn. It takes so much to actually change that mind set because it is ingrained in our very being. When you do not believe in yourself and enter an audition or interview and expect to be rejected it truly sticks out. You may not even notice that you are doing it because it has become a pre-set to you. Give yourself a break and know that you are worthy, valid and individual. Be strong and change that mind set and just know that you are deserving. If you have the talent and do the work then you have every right to be there and be in with a chance of getting that part or place at drama school or that new job.
 
I swear these roads are well traveled and you can change course but you need to believe in yourself. 2018 and every new day is a new start and I hope the year ahead is a much better one for you. If we can help you then never hesitate to reach out. Take care!
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So many of us worry not about death but about the fact that we may get to the end and realise that we never lived.

So many of us worry not about death but about the fact that we may get to the end and realise that we never lived. So many of us spend our lives not pursuing our dreams and afraid to be ourselves.

I have read the words ‘former actor’ so many times lately. What concerns me is that arts is something you go into for love. I know there are cases of pushy stage mums but later in life if you go into theatre then you do it for you. Family businesses like having a long line of dentists for example is different and I can see how one could be compelled to go into the family trade and it not being really what they wanted to do.

It is tragic that so many have reached the point where this often rotten industry has made you brand yourself ‘former actor’ etc.

Truth is people less talented than you will get the parts you want. People who don’t deserve to breathe the same air as you will sit there and judge you and they will criticise you and make you feel second class but please don’t let them make you give up and become a ‘former’ anything.

If I can ask one thing of you this Christmas it is to take down the ‘former’ and leave the word actor or singer or whatever it might be. Give 2018 a chance and try again and show those who doubt you that they have not beaten you.

The thing I find most annoying about the arts is that no matter how talented you are there is just no guarantee that you will ever rise to the top of your profession.

The thing I find most annoying about the arts is that no matter how talented you are there is just no guarantee that you will ever rise to the top of your profession.

I always compare this with sports. If you are the best snooker player in the World then you can qualify and win the World championship. If you are a great footballer then you will be scouted and be playing soon enough in the big time. Yet you can be the greatest tripple threat out there and never be given a chance.

Always find it amusing to hear that Ronaldo had a stinker of a game. Imagine how much work you would get if you were a lead in a show and had a stinker or even better when players have a bad season. Oh they were shit all year in Phantom but we will still pay them a fortune and pick them. Would never happen!!!!

It is unfair. Truly unfair and you can be that good and never get through the system. I hate the fact that just for ease people cast or give opportunities to those they know or have used before. You may be so much better but it is easier to just use them. They also worry that you can perform consistently at that level and know the other person will deliever a decent job .You are a risk. Anything new is a risk and people have stopped taking chances. With a chance can come greatness.

Never doubt your own ability because when you do then you no longer have any chance. You are not delusional. You truly can be missed and be that good and deserving of those roles. Reality TV I detest and there have been many wonderful talents that have come through but seriously because you made into the top 32 on X Factor you are automatically more deserving? Bull*hit. A bit of autotune, smoke and s choir can make amateur seem like genius to the viewing public. Truth is nobody knows what great is anymore. That standard has been lost.

Please stick in there and there are still good people out there who want the best they can find. Be part of the change yourselves and raise the standards wherever you can. Shine my friends and blind them with your light.